Why? Why is my house always such a freakin’ mess?
It’s driving me crazy.
I spent most of Monday putting away clothes and still, they are not all put away. You know why? Because laundry never stops. Because housekeeping is not my thing. Because I’m lazy when it comes to cleaning. Because I married a man similar to me. Because I have spawned three messy, disorganized children, who I sometimes catch picking things up, looking them over, and then throwing, whatever it is, down on the floor. As if!
Their boorish behavior isn’t limited to toys, pencils, pennies, Legos, you name it. Today, I found a granola wrapper, snack wrapper, and edamame shell (and a million other non-food items) on the floor in the living room. Since my boys would rather die than eat edamame, I know which child is responsible for that indiscretion. The granola bar, well, that’s anyone’s guess, but I think I know the culprit. I’m pretty sure it’s the same child, who recently went on a play date, and marveled so much over the fact that his friend was allowed to eat on the couch, that his mom actually said something to me about it. Whatever!
Why do my children think the floor is their trash can? Sure, I may fall short on putting away clothes, and I might leave random things out on the counter, but I’m pretty sure I’ve never just balled up my napkin and tossed it into the den.
Neanderthals.Oh, I know I’ve said it before, and before that, and before that, and I’m sure I’ll say it again, and again, and again, but we have too much stuff. And too much of that stuff is just laying around.
Exhibit A: Moxie Girl. Apparently, she gets such a workout that she just drops down from exhaustion, wherever she might be at that moment (meaning all over the house).B. The random shoe, that doesn’t even fit anyone, anymore. Where did this even come from?Exhibit C. The carbon monoxide detectors that both need to be replaced. (Hey, did you know that CO2 detectors won’t stop chirping if they’re seven years old? It doesn’t matter how many new batteries you put in there). The smoke detector that was accused of making the chirping, and subsequently cleared of all charges. Geez, when did I right about that? How long does it take us to hang a smoke detector back up? The picture that needs to be hung. The random table that ended up, ever so awkwardly, in the upstairs hallway, because WE JUST CAN”T SEEM TO THROW ANYTHING OUT! The pathetic candle holders trying to make the table seem useful. And D. The Uno Cards that I found stashed under the couch, because it was so much easier to shove them under the couch than place them back into a baggie. Seriously, children?
I never blogged about my great toy round-up of 2012, but I spent over a week, seven days, people, collecting toys from all throughout the house, sorting, tossing, categorizing, blah, blah, blah. I swore it would never get out of hand, again. I swore that we would clean up after ourselves, all of us, and yet, somehow, it’s all gone to hell, again!
Why? Why!! (meant to be read with agonizing emotion)
Someone like me shouldn’t read the blog I Heart Organizing, it only crushes my housewife self-esteem, but the masochist in me can’t stay away. Recently, she was featured on HGTV for her organizational skills (along with other fellow organizers). I watched the video with fascination and a great deal of envy. It seemed so easy. Create a master shopping list, get home from the grocery store, divide all your stuff up, put it away, etc. I thought, I can do that. And then, I went food shopping, returned home and had absolutely no desire to start organizing. Frankly, I was just happy to get everything in the refrigerator.
To add to my self torture, not too long, I took a stab at trying to follow a cleaning routine, on this blog. Do I even have to say I failed? My problem, I couldn’t maintain the daily tasks of clearing clutter and sweeping floors, which are the worst tasks, and the whole reason my house is a mess in the first place. If I could do those two tasks, then I wouldn’t be searching out blogs looking for cleaning routines.
Listen, I clean the bathrooms. I vacuum the floors. I change our bed linens. What I cannot do, is keep up with the daily clutter and mess of our lives.